Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Relief? Or Ecstasy?

There are certain things that are best learnt during childhood and swimming is one of them. Most people who know swimming say it’s so easy, all you have to do is just float! But that’s easier said than done when you have lived most part of your life fearing deep waters and avoided them like its been shark infected. Suddenly you are told to deep dive into it and tame it, love it, float on it, and relax like there is no worry in this world. How do you undergo this transformation? Again the same ‘people’ ask you get into the water, get wet and start learning.. There is no other way… As I found out its easier said than done..

For almost three weeks while trying to learn I have taken in enough chlorine water to fill an overhead tank, my confidence has been beaten to the core, and it felt that somehow the forces around me were making sure I drown even with a learning board.

Believe me! Learning swimming does take a toll.. You see toddlers swimming in the pool and you cant even float it takes a toll. You cant breathe-in air and suddenly start looking at finding the ground/floor beneath you, it takes a toll. You start regretting so much that you start cursing yourself, for having taken this step, it takes a toll… Finally a time comes when you think of quitting and saying “Is it really important for me to learn this? Cant I live without it?” Its just a matter of time before one comes to such a state. In fact it took me about three weeks to reach there and was almost at the verge of quitting.

But I finally swam today.. :) More than anything else, it was relief…

I had thought of giving up so many times especially last week when I couldn’t even swim properly with a board. There was actually not much of progress and the motivation levels really dropped off. After a lot of thought of giving up I asked my trainer to come today morning.. The day started in a usual manner. Struggled with my techniques. Drank enough chlorine water and was getting tired very easily (which shouldn’t happen ideally if you breathe properly).

However, today for whatever reason we kept pushing and trying various things. Finally, I was able to manage my first proper swimming lap. I am far away from proclaiming that I know swimming but now the ‘belief’ is back and I know I can do this. I might not want to swim in the sea but swimming in a pool is a must have according to me (as of now..:)) and I see that I can reach that stage before the end of the month.

Maybe my case was a bit extreme or maybe people do learn it very easily but let me tell you, for me running the ultra-marathon was easier than learning to swim! The ‘belief’ was just wasn’t there.. And that ‘belief’ goes for a nose dive everytime there was a failed attempt. So it takes a herculean task to get into the swimming pool the next time. It’s all interconnected you see..

Like most things in life that makes you happy or the things that you actually want, this too is going through its cycle of ups and downs, and there were times when giving up was the easier option but finally I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and it makes be relieved, happy and ecstatic at the same time..

Here’s to hoping my love affair continues with the wonderful water..

Happy Valentine’s day everyone!